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Two dates where I was probably settling, compromising and giving in, just to go on dates. Not at all, they were perfectly normal, fine people, just not the match for me. It’s literally a 40 minute survey asking you the same question 37 different ways.

First thing you have to do is fill out the SATs of online dating.

That’s always kind of awkward when you’re supposed to be “working”. You’re going to continue reading without telling any of your hot female co-workers? I had some other titles in work for this blog, but they just didn’t capture the essence of what I was trying to say. A “computer” matches you up based on “29 levels of compatibility”, which I’m fine with. Because you’re thinking, wow some super computer down at Eharmony headquarters is crunching vectors and differential equations just to find my perfect mate, and everyday you log in and see new matches, that you think are hand picked from the computer gods above.

I mean, I feel bad if you’re at work right now reading this, and the biggest letters on your screen involve the words FUCK YOU. So after you completed their riddles and questions, you then can start receiving “matches”, hurray!

They’re probably closed you out and you didn’t know. I WISH they had closed me out, that way at least I know they’re weren’t interested, they would be removed from my list.

In any case, I’m baffled as to why girls just don’t close out the match if they’re not interested. What’s more likely is eharmony never deletes accounts, so I’m matched with girls that joined for the free weekend 6 months ago, and don’t even know they have a message from me in their queue.You don’t even notice that she hasn’t responded because your distracted by the new excitement of these new matches.But then, you start realizing, wait a minute, no ones responding back to you.You can’t proceed to the next awkward stage of eharmony until the other person responds back.So you send over your questions for stage 1 of 4 and then you have to wait for them to respond. But it’s fine, you don’t really care that this person hasn’t responded in a day or two because each day you get a new batch of matches hand picked by these computer gods as people that match you on 29 levels of compatibility.

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