Casual dating vs a relationship
I was thrilled with the way he was direct and appreciative: If he wanted to see me, he’d ask, and he always made sure to let me know he had a great time. But we were both keeping each other at arm’s length emotionally — at least I was, anyway.
Even so, I wasn’t immune to the warming effect of intimacy.
I was open to going out and meeting people after escaping an exhausting and unhealthy relationship, but I wasn’t exactly eager to jump into dating, and I was nervous that doing so digitally might bring about potentially confusing situations. I felt embarrassingly out of touch with the culture of dating and was too much of a wuss to make an earnest effort.
There was a lot of stammering, pregnant pausing and a general lack of sense-making.
I knew he was emotionally intelligent enough to recognize that I’d put myself in a vulnerable position by addressing this elephant in the room, but since I’d done it with the broadest stroke possible, the open-endedness had him quite literally speechless.
When he re-introduced himself to me, I charmingly replied, “Of course I know who you are” — a partial lie, as I don’t think we’d actually exchanged names before.
He was scruffily cute and had an indistinct accent that pronounced tomato as A few days later, I received an Instagram DM from him asking if I’d like to hang out sometime. Our rapport was less flirtatious than it was friendly.